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family problems... (message I wrote to Jay)   
02:36pm 21/08/2007
  bleh, I'm in the library now... my little brother learned some pretty bad language recently and he went off on me when I told the dog to shut up. Like really bad... And that dog killed my sisters 5 baby hamsters. I am so upset.
He told me to "suck his balls" and to "fuck off". I ended up just leaving but I won't lie, I wanted to give him a smack int he face. He deserved one too. I almost never come home and he is always sitting there watching TV sucking his thumb and he is 15 now. Something is wrong with him and he should not be talking to his sister that way. I know I am not home much but that should be all of the more reason that he shouldn't be so crazy and mean towards me. Insane... Have my appointment at 5:30, then club Aria at 10:30 then I'm coming home. They already filled my room with various junk so there is no way I could sleep on my bed anyways...
Sorry I know I should have a journal to write this stuff but I knew I wanted to tell you because it makes me so upset to talk about that I'd rather write it down. No one yells at me like the way my brother did today, he's gotten so much bigger than me too now that it's pretty frightening. My Dad said he learns the language from TV and they have cable too so. Makes sense because all I ever see him doing is watching TV and playing video games and sucking him thumb... just that he is fifteen now it worries me a lot. I hope the less time I spend at home that my siblings will eventually change to more rational as they get older so I can hang out with them eventually at least civil like. My sister would do good going to college in providence I think. It's made me a lot better person so maybe it could be a good place for her to be a bit farther from the little town of concord, MA but not too too far. My sister can be cool sometimes... and she is at least going to be sharing the upsetness about her baby hamsters dying.
That dog needs to be put down it's killed too many of our small animals. Its no good...
------------------------------------------------

My Dad said that he learned the "suck my balls" phrase from south park and when a general in WWII said that to the nazis... my brother is kind of obsessed with war and battle video games online. In all my years of being abused and any abusive relationships. I have never been straight up yelled at with such horrible words. And that my brother is saying this really makes me worried. I had problems when I was younger too... but I think it was caused because I got abused early in life... then later on because I was abused I was looking for abuse and after being abused so much I decided it would be easier to be a dom and get paid to abuse other and now.... I am just trying to normalize myself a bit my putting all this into my music, Djing, and performance art....
okay enough for now
 
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club therapy insident   
01:46pm 05/05/2007
 

Club Therapy

Hello everyone,

For all of you who are wondering what happened last night. Club Therapy lost their

The only venue in Providence I will now be working with from now on is my home base from the start Club Hell, where my first party thrown Sept 11th 2005 "BeautifuK" with Dj Venom . From now on I am

-Madeleine

Incident last nightliquor license a few weeks ago and I did not become notifed of such until I stepped into the club to setup that night. So then people were coming in, then were asking for immediate refunds because they could not drink at the bar. Then the power went out for a half an hour and with that I decided to piece out inside of paying a club without power or a liquor license 750 and being in debt. I deeply apologize for the inconvenience that this may have caused to you. Any Djs/Sound people will be paid in full by myself personally and it will be arranged through out this week. Please stay with me here, as I will continue to throw parties that revolutionize. I appreciate and love all of you and want to keep to dedicating my life to making yours more enjoyable in the nightlife.consternating on my year long piercing apprenticeship under Shawn, the owner of Kaleidoscope tattoo in Cambridge. As for nightlife in the Northeast I will be narrowing it down my effort in solo promotional projects to: Hell in Providence on Wednesday a month, 2 Saturdays a month in Lowell, MA at Down the Street Cafe (one Fetish/Industrial themed One and one rave themed), Club Diva's in Northampton, MA, as well as a monthly Foot Fetish Party at Lotus in NYC. As well as National and International Dj bookings that sign my contract to fully accommodate. Club Hell this Wednesday the 9th "Puppet & Master". Then Club Montrose this Friday as well As Houston with the Digi Dolls this Saturday. This week is going to be really amazing. Let me again express my sincere apologizes for what happened last night at Therapy. As in life is not always perfect, there will be bad times and there will be good times. Thank you all, for your understanding and sticking by me as not just a dj/club promoter, but as a real person and friend.
 
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09:38pm 18/04/2007
 

Respect. This one word runs always true to be the most important amongst such a lifestyle that may seem to be a rollercoaster ride of mischief and mayhem. Thought. Sometimes too much may result in self suffering. Therefor thinking when needed is just as important as not thinking when not needed. To take orders and to give orders. Respect must be in relationships however strange and uncharted they might be such as the ones of a Domina & Slave, Such as the ones of a Promoter & Talent. I stand tall on high heels for what I believe in. Never afraid to temporarily burn bridges in situations that might have compromised the level of respect I am to receive. Professionalism and fun. One can get so lost in that of the virtual world that they are not capable of real business oriented relationships which brings them down the the level of the middle schoolers getting all riled up on Instant Messaging fights. In this life I do not need bridges. Nor do I need roads to drive on because with my audioable and visual excellence I will fly up above the rest creating a whole new meaning of what is entertainment in the night and adult industry. Friendships are completely useless the second one stabs another in the back. We all make mistakes but the conniving will pretty much always be so. Those who have no talent and do the same shit every night. Many do not appericiate things in which are handed to them. I idolize, and admire those who have help put me where I am now. They are my heroes and role models. Not the same for many women I have put on my flyers on on stage. No longer do I confuse the women who merely want to be me, with the women who truly care about me. I have in the past created friends into an assortment of flavorless ego monsters. In which I understand because it took an important phone call from a close past lover to take the first hit in braking down my ego back down to size. There is Madeleine and there is Fetish Dolly. A women, a girl, an artistic deviant and a domina. With work and determination, I created this cult. I am the Priestess Dj and preach to you my music. This is not a lifestyle, this is a religion, and dance is the form of worship. Many like to throw around the words mistress and dominatrix. The wild drunks, the jokes, the unfit in body, the whores, the hookers, the attention seekers. But to have control over someone else, you must first have ultimate control over your self. I use my mind and body to control that of others mind and body. The saying, you cannot teach old dogs new tricks is completely wrong. Humans can be trained just as well, if not better than household pets. Older men seem to be the most susceptible to this, especially if you have done your psychological homework and picked at their brains to get a grasp of their ultimate manipulation tool, their fetish. Sure, any man can be dragged around by his dick. But if you can put a leash on it then if he makes one wrong move he will only be causing himself so much discomfort and unwanted pain. Let that also be a word to the wise of any men that want me merely because of my name. Like I said before. The most important thing in life for us in general.... RESPECT

 
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orange and purple outfit   
12:22am 20/03/2007
 

Hello there
Not sure if anyone remembers but a while back in November or so. I posted about an orange and purple outfit from house of harlot. It is 5 pieces, orange shorts with purple ruffles and the rest is orange with purple accent borders.
I need someone to custom make me pasties, a bra top, and a 18" waistclincer corset to match it in order to use it for a burlesque performance. The person who promised to do it for me still has not still and I am aching to wear the outfit.
Help anyone please?

 
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Looking for a job: Piercing Apperienticeship, Shop promoter etc   
01:53am 04/03/2007
 

 

Hello there

My continued interest in body piercing and modification has lead to the desire to work at piercing/tattoo shop part time. I am very dedicated and would like to

It all started when I was sixteen years old. Buying 14g hallow needles on ebay and piercing my own

Looking for a shop that wants to get promoted and work with me. I will not be modest of myself in this paragraph as I have earned my name. I have been told I am the best model promoter out there with customized skin. My passions for music, people, professionalism, beauty, and the layout of imagery, which are all

As I applied to many shops. They all had interest. One put me on emergency all in as a desk person, another wanted a portfolio of my work and to watch my performance in a simple piercing, another said they always charge 3,000 for an

Thank you!

-Madeleine

pursue a career as a professional piercer. tongue and lip. When my mother refused to take me to get them done, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Then I started piercing friends tongues and belly buttons. Along with my experiences in getting pierced at shops later on. I have learned a lot from watching and experience. Experiencing and inflicting piercing as a performance art, to piercing as a pleasure, to piercing as a fashion.extremely prevalent in everything I do. Every move I make I consider as an art form in itself, no matter what genre or category it may fall in. apprenticeship. I want to reiterate the fact that I am looking to work. My promoting is an extreme treasure to making a business successful overall. Getting your work in magazines, flyering, conventions, and online marketing. To get your shop known famously worldwide. Bringing in unique clients internationally. With over 40 tattoo and piercing shops in Rhode island which is the smallest state in the U.S.A. Reputation and promotion is vital to success. I will get the tools necessary and start an image portfolio. But I am looking for an experienced professional to learn from. It would be pointless to pay thousands of dollars to watch a lip, navel, tongue, ear, nostril, septum, monroe or eyebrow piercing that I already know how to do. Other more less common and more complicated modifications I need to learn more about. Let me close this blog in saying, please message me for my resume if you are interested in hiring and working with me at your shop. Would be willing to relocate for the right place.
 
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Industrial, EDM 18+   
02:40am 03/02/2007
  Industrial, EDM 18+



To RSVP go to:
http://events.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=events.detail&eventID=166118.93496

This event is going to be massive and a lot of fun. Don't miss out!

 
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Survey   
02:03am 03/02/2007
 
TELL YOU ABOUT MYSELF - The Survey
Name:Madeleine
Birthday:3/31/86
Birthplace:Boston
Current Location:RI
Eye Color:copper
Hair Color:black & white
Height:5'8" (with my boots on :P)
Right Handed or Left Handed:Right
Your Heritage:French Canadian, Native American
The Shoes You Wore Today:Boots
Your Weakness:Boys in eyeliner
Your Fears:Nuclear war
Your Perfect Pizza:BBQ Chicken
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:Tour Europe Djing & Performing, Throw the best and most unique parties the Northeast has ever seen!
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:lalalala
Thoughts First Waking Up:ugh
Your Bedtime:6am
Pepsi or Coke:Red Bull
MacDonalds or Burger King:Burger King
Chocolate or Vanilla:strawberry
Cappuccino or Coffee:COFFeeeeeeeee
Do you Smoke:no
Do you Swear:sometimes
Do you Sing:
Do you Shower Daily:no
Have you Been in Love:yes
Do you want to go to College:no way
Do you want to get Married:yes
Do you belive in yourself:yes
Do you get Motion Sickness:yes
Are you a Health Freak:mmmm chocolate chip cookies
Do you get along with your Parents:yes
Do you like Thunderstorms:yes
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:yes
In the past month have you been on Drugs:no
In the past month have you gone on a Date:yes
In the past month have you been on Stage:I live on stage
In the past month have you been Dumped:no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:no
Ever been Drunk:yes
Ever been called a Tease:for a living
Ever been Beaten up:yes on stage
How do you want to Die:Overdose, then burn my body to ashes don't let me rot in the ground
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:A club/dungeon Owner & an Environmental Activist
What country would you most like to Visit:The Amazon River, The Great Barrier Reef, & Tokyo

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
 
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depression in winter   
07:46am 03/01/2007
 

Maybe if I just got this whole seasonal thing fixed. It would help alot. Truth is that it is winter again and I find myself extremely unhappy. I feel it is nessacary to move to where most of my friends and family are to help keep myself above water for the season. Jumping off to Los Angeles dosen't seem to make sense just yet it is nice and warm but paid dj gigs aren't so easy to get there.I am moving to rhode island and opening up my own dungeon. Bringing Joey, yes yet another jobless boyfriend with me. Yes that is sad but the truth is that he will do anything for me when it comes down to it and I am all he has. His family is beyond shit and trust me when I say... he is genuine and truely cares about me. I know I could search the whole world and not find one person like that. Everyone is shit. Everyone. Dosen't matter what it seems on the outside. No one is true to love to true to skill anymore... living in new jersey has been horrible don't get me wrong... his family will never meet my family. Not even at our wedding if we ever have one. My family is amazing compared to them. You have NO idea what I have been through living here. Imagine the movie pink flamingos with the huge fat mom eating eggs in the crib but with 3 kids running around without fathers and ghetto spoiled brat people. I am leaving this saturday after I record my demos. I am really exicted to record my demos this friday and I hope they will take me around the world. I feel like I am searching for a piece of myself but more that I am a like a messenger of music and performance. I want to change the world for the better. How people view the world without seeing through sound. How people feel themselves wearing latex sliding down the tips of their fingers. I want to eat sushi almost everday and tale hot baths every morning to settle down after work. I want to be genuine and not tell anymore lies. To endulge in passion and feel this passion. Joey inspired me to be this way. To be true to myself. It may be true that the good guy always finishes last but I like to have sex for hours with him and whisper I love you in his ears a hundred times everynight. I hope that when I get out of here I feel myself again. Ever since I got my birth control shot I have been like this lifeless anti-sexual zombie. Thank god my car got fixed today. My kitty is really awesome too she is comming with us too of course!

 
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dear british airways   
04:12pm 19/12/2006
 

Dear British Airways,

I regret to inform you that I am completely and utterly

As I arrived in Athens. My bag did not make the connecting flight and the people handling the baggage told me that my bag would make the next connecting flight at 6pm. It never made it and my music was in the bag. I went out there and made a fool of myself. All I had to wear where the pajamas that I wore on the plane. The promoter posted my posters and flyers all over Athens and this was a HUGE event with 500 people attending just to come see me DJ and Perform. Not only did your airline not make the next connecting flight after that. But I didn't

I am looking for

Sincerly, Madeleine Carrette

disgusted by your services from my last flight. Words cannot describe the pain and suffering I had to go through because of your mistakes, not only emotionally for myself but for my career and the club that I was flown out by. I was flown by Consitintous to Dj and Perform at a club night in Athens on December 18th 2006. Due to poor planning the plane that from NYC to london left three hours later because it did not have a place to take off. Then I was rushed and had to run to the connecting flight to Athens. Not only did I not receive much help from your employees at the airport... but they laughed at me because I took off my shoes and was rushing to get my flight. I was so humiliated and upset but luckly I got there in time right before they took off even though ont he loudspeaker they said the flight was already closed. receive my baggage until the LAST night I was in Athens. I had to cancel the photo shoot I had planned for the cover of my new album because I had no clothing. My whole business trip to Athens was ruined and pointless. I am so upset with your airline I cannot even express the embarrassment and carelessneess your employees had with me and my bags just throwing it around. I had a brand new 200 dollar bag to carry my stuff and when I gave it to them the handle worked great. I got it back and not only as the handle broken so I couldn't carry it, but my eyeshadow and stuff was looked through and thrown around and things broken inside.reimbursement for all of this although any amount of money and flights cannot make up for not only the damage to my personal items but the damage to my career as an international Dj and performer. I would like a flight back to Athens in May of 2007 so I can do what I set out to do there with my baggage. I am willing to stay there for a week and perform the second to last night I am in Athens so that I am sure to get my bag for the show. I would also like 200 dollars if possible to make up for my losses and damage to my luggage and personal items. This would all mean a lot to me and my relationship with your company for future business and the suggestion of your services toward your company to my friends, family and co-workers. Please respond so we can agree on something or I will be forced to take legal action on your company for what it has done to me.
 
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latex   
01:23am 30/11/2006
 

Hello there!
I am brand new to designing latex. Wanted to learn where I could order the glue to start experimenting. Have been modeling latex a bit and wanted to start working on some of my own outfits. 
Also got a new outfit and it is missing a few things in order to make it functional including pasties, ruffle bra and possibly stockings or garter. Anyone who can help or has some latex in these colors?

 

 
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my first utube   
03:40pm 13/11/2006
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_V9Ntqx0UwY  
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hopeless circuitry   
09:33pm 12/09/2006
  when you wish you could
stop
breathing
put yourself away in storage
for a week or twenty

inhalation is only possible
through a gas mask
because they think your not old enough
to do it on your own

filter out toxins
puking green slime in the morning
then you wake up
and you realize your sleeping on someone elses coach
in a ghost town that is supposed to be
one of the most populated cities in the world

too much for the earth
they don't recognize me when I change my hair color
is it because of the past
she has no face its melted like candle wax

that's when you know
they only know you
from your glitz and glam
what was in the inside never mattered
because there was nothing inside

now you see my hair is blank
just black and white like an old photograph
to symbolize that when it comes down to it
you need to love my insides
the organs and the motherboards
entangled in the wires and the circuits

can you hear?
the sound of my heart
listening through speakers tattooed on my chest
or is it silenced by your ego
and blared out by the clubs repetitive music
or maybe the mocking police sirens rushing through the street

because a feeling means more than a look
and a word can be false, but not so with an emotion
trading body fluids in the city
is similar to trading lipsticks
reach into your purse
can I use your mirror?
and smash it on the sidewalk with my high heeled boot
because it doesn't matter anymore
take a chance
J walking through traffic
when the light says stop
then GO
 
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letter from my live-in slave   
04:33pm 12/09/2006
 
Hello Miss Dolly,
 
Since before you arrived at Zeck I’ve been meaning to send you my thoughts and perspectives on submission (and dominance) – given that is the central theme between us… For us to get along, be happy and grow I believe it is imperative that we understand each others perspective on submission and dominance, friendship and co-habitation.
 
I’d also hope for us to keep an open, honest and ongoing dialogue, so as to prevent any frustrations, misunderstandings or anxieties that might simmer between us that might cause this special connection to breakdown. Please tell me if I do so something (s) that may annoy or disturb you or anything that may make you uncomfortable, please. My desire is to make this a home, and very very much want to make you incredibly happy and incredibly comfortable here… It is now your home.
 
Essentially to date it is has been wonderful and enlightening… You make me smile, a lot. I believe this type of lifestyle is more than just a lark, or a game, or a hobby, or part time – I believe it is a serious interaction between 2 like minded people with extremely similar viewpoints. It is about 2 people playing off each other to make each other stronger - even though those viewpoints are approached from 2 separate and distinct angles (the dominant side and the sub side).
 
(As promised a few weeks back, I will send you my thoughts on how strength comes from submission – my thoughts are just about formulated).
 
Although I did not necessarily seek this bond out to this degree, I am genuinely happy it has evolved as it has - and after some reflection it is not all that odd that our paths crossed and we made this connection. It is also not odd that this connection was advanced and pushed forward to this level by you – it was only natural – you being the naturally dominant and me just naturally and willingly abiding by your wishes and desires. After more reflection, it could not have happened any other way, it makes me smile.
 
Without anticipating or planning for the events with you of the past few months I wrote this to Lauren a few months back; it is a higher level insight to me and a good starting point for what I want to try to say, some excerpts:
 
Hello …,
                 
… – but from the highest level let me try to capture it succinctly:
 
I think you know me a bitJ  – I am essentially not a submissive person. I am an intelligent, goal oriented individual who at times is a bit aggressive in pursuit of these goals - all good qualities I believe.
 
Submission to me is not about short-term immediate thrills or gratification performed randomly. Regarding my submission - it is so much more – it is a way of life – a special way of life - a way of life that I fully intend to continue for quite some time and continue to grow with – with people or person of like minds.
 
Serious submission (and dominance) is a very special thing for a select few people in this world. I feel it can provide a wide range of benefits. One of which – and I had mentioned this to you in the past – is that serious submission provides me with strength and completeness - such a good thing.
 
You were instrumental in this evolution and growth that now continues (my reference to her about growth was about you Miss Dolly). I was never quite sure you fully understood…
 
Regards,
 
 
 
People, you and I, are affected in the world around us, by the daily interactions of everyday life. This affects our moods, our demeanor, our actions and behaviors.
 
We all experience days of high spirits and low spirits, days being melancholy and days of euphoria, days of being talkative and days of being an introvert – we can’t help it, we are all human.
 
The causes and frequency of these moods that we all experience contribute to each and everyone’s own unique individuality, personality and character.  
 
To that effect, I will always, everyday, try my best to be sensitive and understanding to your moods, your feelings, your emotions and energy levels – taking the time not to be overbearing with you and not to intrude into your current frame of mind and providing you the privateness and solitude you’ll need at times. By way of example, if I am in an extended submissive state and you are not in a dominant state, I need to understand this and will do my best.
 
My life is just a bit complex, with varying degrees of enjoyment, satisfaction, frustration and stress etc., causing my moods to shift. I need to mange and integrate these moods and feelings with my strong and now growing feelings of submission, caring, devotion and concern for you…
 
If I can, let me further define my various states of mind.  I can vary from being in that extended submissive state - being incredibly submissive and weak, wanting/needing to grovel, adore, worship you and be beat and tortured by you (I believe you’ve been witness to thisJ) - to being a bit sarcastic and playful with you, with many moods in between.
 
(At times with you, the extended submissive state can just be overwhelming – and you seem to know just how to put me there.)
 
I so want you to know that regardless of my state, which can vary from day to day, hour to hour or even minute to minute, my overall and overriding submission to you does not and will not change – being in an extended submissive state or aggravated by life’s events. Also by way of example, if I am in non-submissive state, that in no way suggests that I am not still completely submissive to you.
 
I will venture to say that your states of mind change as well. I’ve seen you in an overbearing dominant mood (sometimes I feel the pain…) to being quiet and introspective, which is something quite the opposite and a normal and very expected way of life. I actually enjoy watching and witnessing your various states – it reveals so much about the person I adore…
 
This goes along the lines of balance in life, which is so incredibly important to maintain. I’ll always respect you, treat you like a princess, and have life focus on you.
 
 
Further thoughts on dominance / submission:
 
 
For me, submission is derived from mutual respect; I view submission as somewhat sophisticated and complex, not just a random, aimless superficial barrage of derogatory comments and actions. Those actions, in my opinion should be calculated and carried out with purpose and/or thought (at least most times…J).
 
 
During the first few days I thought you thought the more disrespectful you were to me the more you’ll control me and the more submissive I’ll become – it had the opposite effect - my submission for you was waning and I questioned why I agreed to this.
 
That is not the case now – I am elated you are here.
 
I do want to comment on the very noticeably different manner you now have regarding showing respect and courtesy for me, our house, our time, yourself and just in general… You are so classy, charming, admirable and exquisite – it is just so marvelous being around you – I am so lucky. It is so incredibly pleasing – you really are wonderful – and the destruction of me continues.
 
I so appreciate your thoughtfulness: your disposition toward the house, not allowing Aries to leave her “friends” bag, appreciate how you introduce me to people – not in a derogatory way, but a respectable warm way… letting me know you’re not coming home… signs of respect.
 
Your signs of respect in no way compromise your dominance and control over me – it actually significantly enhances your dominance, your control, makes it stronger, more sophisticated… more desirable… the destruction does continue.
 
In your so exceptionally special dominant ways and along with your spectacularly special beauty; the more of you I am exposed to, the more and more submissive I become - the more I desire to do for you and the more I desire to worship and adore you – and always always respect you…
 
I am not trying say that random or planned beatings and slaps are disrespectful or not wanted. Please continue to do as you please to/with me - when you please - whether it is beatings, spitting, slaps, torture, tying me, dragging me on a leash (with any part of me), putting me in the cage or a cage or whatever pleases you.
 
I am trying to say I so appreciate your attitude toward me from a broader perspective (an adult perspective), relating to living and interacting with each other and other people – it creates further submissiveness.
 
 
I am also coming to trust you more and more and more. Trust is something that has always taken time for me, much time, and is so very important to me - but many times in the past it has just simply eluded me. (It takes 10 years to build trust and just 10 seconds to ruin it…) For another time I’ll write you my thoughts on trust – because I believe trust is truly one of the great benefits that come from the “dungeon” (or a dominant / submissive bond). If that trust can transcend outside the “dungeon space”, then an incomparable state of mind has been reached by 2 people that is matchless and achieved by very few people…it is special and it can be so incredibly rewarding.
 
So in the dungeon, outside the dungeon, in the extended submissive state, or outside the extended submissive state – do with me as you please, do whatever you want, whenever you want – because that indeed does reinforce the dominant / submissive bond and your control. Please never stop being you - you are as close to perfect as anyone can be – in so many aspects both inside and out. I want to make you happy… 
 
I guess I am trying to say in an overall or from a top level perspective, mutual respect is a very good attribute for us to have – and if that exists all the wonderful things in and out of the “dungeon” can be accomplished in this wonderful bond that we are developing. All the tactics and techniques, the beatings, the control and all else will just grow and grow and grow. 
 
As I get to know more and more of the fabulous Miss Dolly (and by the way Madeleine too) I am gaining insight to your personality, your emotions and temperament, your highs and your lows – and my comment is – you are truly a wonderful person – with deep thoughts and emotions, caring, sensitive, with deep feelings and strong motivations.
 
As well as your submissive, I am your friend and you are mine - I’ll always treat you with the utmost respect, I’ll always be your friend, someone to trust, someone to count on and confide in, someone you can depend on and someone who’ll never judge you and will always be at your side (ok, maybe your feet) and be incredibly supportive of your life, your goals and your ambitions… I’ll try to make you smile…
I’m someone who’ll cater, care and provide comfort for you. My feelings are that I truly am your submissive, not necessarily a slave, which in my view is a much deeper, much stronger bond than a slave… the destruction does indeed continue.
 
You are beautiful – inside and out – nothing but the best for you.
 
Robbie

Check out AOL.com today. Breaking news, video search, pictures, email and IM. All on demand. Always Free.
 
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03:24pm 12/09/2006
 
look what I just got to wear at the london rubberball! MMM!
Going to wear it with a matching latex school girl skirt! 

a random email from a slave:
Hello.  I saw that you are coming to Boston, and I
would love to serve you.  I have traveled to NY before
and sessioned at Pandoras Box, but not recently.  I
read your web pages and looked at your reviews on
Maxfisch, and you are exactly the type of domme I
enjoy serving.  I prefer my domination mixed with a
good deal of creativity and enjoyment on the part of
the mistress, and that seems to fit you well.

While I love to pamper and please in almost any way
that the mistress enjoys, my particular passion is
forced full toilet slavery/degredation.  One of the
best mistresses I ever served told me she was going to
rape me with her shit, and she did just that.  To be
very upfront, I have been in the bdsm scene since the
late 70s, and drinking urine that whole time, but am
fairly new to forced scat consumption.  It is
difficult to find anyone in this area who uses subs in
this way and who really enjoys it.  And while I have
done it many times, I haven't done it enough, or
consistently enough to be good at it.  I still tend to
want to stop, to gag, and sometimes throw up.  That's
why I prefer it to be a consensual non-consent type
scene, where it's not in my control to stop.

If this would interest you, then I would love to be
your toilet while you are here.  If there is any other
way that I can be of service, such as running errands,
or doing advance marketing for you, please let me know
and I would be glad to do so.
-John

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam?  Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
http://mail.yahoo.com
 
     Read 1 - Post
 
poem by some random by guy about me and dancing for psychick tv   
02:31pm 09/09/2006
  Hot green, franken-teen, make-up from a quarantine, dead girl live in a dream, naked latex fetish queen. Princess dolly doesnt mess around, speakers always wired for sound, shes knows that pains a pleasure, and she keeps all the treasure.She keeps the measures, beats , bpm, latex and leathers nice and trim. Candy coated chains and treasures, treat her nice or she could mame and sever. Party queen, shes nasty rich, Just a teen, shes dom not switch. Her ass youll kiss and beg for more. Everyone loves to be dollys whore.







here is the flyer and text (for email and posting, with links)
for the "Lust 'n Rust" party @ the Psychic TV show sept 24th:


Candy Factory presents
PSYCHIC TV

Sunday, September 24th, 10pm-->

special Psychic TV musical sets, screenings, video lightshow
and limited edition merchandise

"Lust 'N Rust"
with DJ's Die J! Mars (Sin City/Zenwarp/Gomorrah/Rise NYC)
(http://www.DieJMars.com)
and Xris SMack! (BYTE, SMack! )
(http://www.SMack-Fetish.com)
MUSIC : Industrial , Dark Electro, EBM, & more...

Fetish Diva SONIA BLAZE (Black and Blue Ball co-creator)
metal grinding performance, and with her band TRISOMY X
(http://www.MySpace.com/47xxx)

also featuring: Mistress Maxine , Mistress DeVille
live sets by Post-Apocalyptic Kid NEON MUSIC
(http://www.MySpace.com/NeonMusic)
Elaine K. (BinaryStarrSystem) and Shelly Ebner (Rise NYC)
http://www.myspace.com/BinaryStarrSystem
http://www.myspace.com/RiseNYC

Go-Go: Fetish Dolly (www.FetishDolly.com)
Dark Art by Faylock and more!

@ Galapagos Art Space
70 N. 6th St (between Kent and Wythe) Williamsburgh Brooklyn, NY
http://www.GalapagosArtSpace.com

http://www.GenesisP-Orridge.com * http://www.MySpace.com/PTV3
http://www.SMack-Fetish.com/events.html
 
     Post
 
bitches buyin my undies off my web site from montreal!   
02:28pm 09/09/2006
  -----------------------------------
PayPal Shopping Cart Contents
-----------------------------------

Item Name: Thong
Item Number: 5

Quantity: 1

Total: $75.00 USD



Item Name: Bra
Item Number: 8

Quantity: 1

Total: $60.00 USD



Cart Subtotal: $135.00 USD

Cart Total: $135.00 USD



-----------------------------------
Payment Details
-----------------------------------

Total Amount: $135.00 USD
Currency: U.S. Dollars


Montreal, Quebec H4B 1P3
Canada


I can't put his info down here but ya!! WOO my first buyer!!



CHECKOUT MY NEW SITE!
 
     Post
 
love   
07:05am 05/09/2006
  I know that I am falling in love for the first time truely
and somehow he makes me into a good person. He is such an angel himself. It's like a miracle who ever knew I could be a good person.
 
     Post
 
it's that shivering feeling I just got when I came out of the shower. Something not right. And I dun   
07:34pm 21/08/2006
 
mood: crushed
it's that shivering feeling I just got when I came out of the shower. Something not right. And I dunno what it is. I need a change a HUGE change. Bigger than this. Bigger than being nice and my hair color dyed different. Medication? Helps a lot. But it cannot push away this odd feeling I get when the seasons change. I can feel winter coming and the DR Jackel and Mrs Hyde type thing. Joey's sick. I'm busting my ass to be the flyer designer/dj/audio/dominatrix.WHY EVERYTHING? I feel like I am the only one who enjoys doing this and can do it right. And in the club scene no one wants to help you unless you have a whole load of bullshit to talk about. Just getting a venue in manhattan to throw a big rave party at. I will be 21 in less than two months. That means legal. That means Im starting to get old. Alcholics... drug a holics... my slave roberts screams from his nightmares at night... I see Roberts muffin crumbs in his bed and people waking up the next morning and this constant feeling of regret from the past that never goes away. What is this constant feeling of darkness that has always been hovering over my head? Can I come to realize that it will never go away? Will it ever go away? When will the hurt stop?
Music makes it go away
Makeup covers it temporarily. 
but makeup is really what gets your booked in a club and so does promotion. is it possible to have both?
How can your best friend change so much and dump you and her girlfriend for someone named DJ Hoekiller
Why am I still in new york? When I swore I would never spend another cold season in here. What is keeping me here? What is keeping me anywhere? My family who doesn't even know who I am? All of my good friends in new england who actually give to shit about me. But if I went back to new england would people appreciate me as much and pay 400 bucks for me to show up a their club to DJ and perform. Sometimes I see photos of myself and all I can see are all of the imperfections. Fly aways wrinkles and somewhere in between a hurt little girl and a some 40 year old gay man pervert or someone who used to abuse me. When we are old and wrinkled. Can we keep no mirrors in the house? When I am old can we be beautifully blind together and will you take care of me if no one will hire me for gigs because I am no longer pretty on the outside?
Who am I talking to? maybe myself. I am afraid of something but I pretend not to see it.
maybe some crazy lady with 10001 cats. What makes me happy is being on stage and making other people happy and feel good about themselves and feel beautiful so... what must last?
what can last?
what will last?
 
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idiotic photo theves   
01:23pm 21/08/2006
 
From: Club Party Monster preHalloween Bash Oct25th 2006
Date: Aug 21, 2006 10:20 AM Flag  spam/abuse  [ ? ]
Subject RE: RE: can i use you images on my flyer
Body: thank you any way



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From:
DJ Fetish Dolly
Date: Aug 21, 2006 10:18 AM

no sorry you cannot use my images on a flyer. I only let people do so if they book me for their party as a DJ, Go-go dancer or performer.


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From:
Club Party Monster preHalloween Bash Oct25th 2006
Date: Aug 21, 2006 10:14 AM

we need to know asap


WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT to use someones image on a flyer if they werent booking them? That is the question. You do not put a DJ's photo on a flyer if they arent DJING there and neither should you put a performers photo on the flyer if they arent performing there.
 
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you turn off my mind   
10:54pm 17/08/2006
 

you turn off my mind

boy you turn off my mind

take a lock like a spell

and keep the key in a box

 

you turn off my mind

the only one who can press stop

on my head running a mile a minute

in circles

this power, pull out the circuits

that can shut off this crazy brain

 

red locks down to your knees

blues eye without a black line

your freckles drive me crazy

biting your hips and doing your makeup

 

our metal faces caught together

that make me never want to look at another

that way

for the first time

 

hit me with the lighting

and the thunder

taking it slow

yet it's exhilarating so fast

my heart is beating from you

and your in another state

miles away I'm racing

 

I don't need water, food, chemicals or false reality anymore

I could survive on only

from your metal kisses

and blue eyes without a black line

 

your the strangest person

I've ever met in my life

can I help you

even if i rub my sparkles

all over your face

 

of you, I can only speak in verses

no sentences can describe

when I shake at night

your the only one who holds me tight

in your arms everything is really alright

 

you don't care about my troubled past

and just talk about the future

and never ask too many questions

In my dreams I could never even imagine dreaming of you

and though you could exist

 

I found you in another country

who knew we only really lived in an hour away

you towered over me

and I threw out my pride

to go out on an limb, alone

and say hello

 

you bring out the best in me

so sweet

and keep my purse

so it won't get lost

if you always hold me tighter

when I cry and still look at me that way

when the makeup washes away

I'll be yours forever

 

 
     Post